JOY TO THE WORLD! (So then why’s everyone so miserable?)

Believe it or not it actually is that time of the year again! Christmas!! Quite honestly, I have absolutely no idea how it got here. Last time I looked, I'm sure it was July. Anyway, whether I like it or not, it's here along with all the craziness that accompanies it. Packed shopping malls, road-rage, drunk drivers, Boney-M belting out in the supermarkets, exhausted shoppers, crying children, Santa's on every corner ringing bells and encouraging you to shop in the different stores.

Yet how many of the people rushing around decorating Christmas trees and spending more money than they should on unnecessary gifts really understand what they are celebrating? Perhaps that is why so many of them are so miserable? They do not understand the great sacrifice Christ made for them. Lets' face it, would you give up paradise, come down to earth, knowing all the pain and suffering you would go through, for a bunch of mostly ungrateful people? Would you? Didn't think so! Nor do they realize the amount of love that He had for us to do that and for His father. What love, what sacrifice, what a gift!

The other day I watched a very brave man, a bell ringing Santa in a local mini-mall, telling everyone that God Loves Them!! Now that was a first! I realized then that that is exactly the message that we should all be taking to the world at this time. So when you sit down to your Christmas dinner tell everyone near to you that we celebrate this day because Jesus was born to demonstrate just how much God loves us! You never know, by spreading God's good news, you may actually put some real joy into someone's Christmas!



THE GIFT

Madness, mayhem, glitter and lies,

Roasted turkeys, gift-wrap and good-byes

Every year we do it again

And again

Round and around it never ends

We search for something

We don't know what

Unfulfilled, saddened

We try again next year

Buy bigger gifts, bigger tree

All the time - lost

Then one Christmas day

A friend hands a 'gift' to me,

A miracle occurs

My eyes are opened

My heart set free as I am shown

God loves Me!

Days in the Desert (or It’s Not About Me!)

I have been struggling lately with ideas on what to write about for this blog and felt like I was definitely having a 'desert' experience. The well of creativity had run dry, my mind was like the Israelites – wandering around in circles, and the possibility of reaching the promised land (or writing a new post) were as remote as landing on Jupiter.

So I shot off a quick "why God, why?" message, (He know's my attention span is limited so tends to tolerate short yelps and mini messages) and responded with a quick "BECAUSE IT'S NOT ABOUT YOU!" Now trust me, I didn't hear a booming voice or anything like that, just had this conviction that this was what I had been doing wrong – making the post about me! My idea, my feelings, my thoughts, when in reality it is and always has been about God.

I realized then that the reason the Israelites had to wander the desert was because they also kept making everything about them! God had performed miracles and rescued them out of slavery. It wasn't long though before they started complaining about the heat, lack of water, food choice, and just about everything else you can possibly think of! It became about them and not about the Awesome God who was present with them every day, who provided for their every need, who had saved them from centuries of slavery with miracles that the might of Pharaoh and all his magicians and armies could not stop.

Unfortunately, that is what we do in our lives as well. We lose sight of God and focus on our little day to day problems. We forget that all that we have comes from God and every breath we take is a gift from Him. If we realize that its' all about God, that we live our lives to bring glory to Him, then we will find that we are no longer wandering dry, dusty, lonely desert roads of life but adventuring through the lush lands of milk and honey that God has promised us.

Why Moses?

Having recently done a little trip through Exodus I couldn't help but ask the question "why Moses?" I mean, let's get real here. He whined, argued, made excuses and, to get his attention, God had to put on a full Hollywood production – burning bush, leprous hand, staff into snake – and even then he still had an excuse as to why he couldn't do what God asked him to! Now Aaron, on the other hand, God gives him an instruction – to go and meet Moses in the wilderness – and off he goes. Now bear in mind that Moses had been out of Egypt for about forty years, and Aaron, (still a slave at age 83 so hadn't done much in the way of travelling), had no idea where to find him; hadn't seen his younger brother for all those decades and didn't really have much to do with him at all from when they were babies! But does he argue? Nope, he just goes off and does as God asks him too! Which brings me back to the point, why Moses? Why not Aaron? Surely Aaron, who was already in Egypt, spoke well, and apparently trusted God, would have been a better candidate? I mean, Moses had grown up in the Pharoah's home, lived in the lap of luxury whilst the rest of the Israelites were slaves, then he killed someone, covered up his crime and ran away – hardly the ideal person to win the trust of the Israelites.

I must admit that looking at the two men, if I had been God, I would have chosen Aaron! Which is probably why God is God and I'm just little old, flawed me. And that's exactly what Moses was – flawed – just like you and me. Aaron also had his faults, but Moses certainly appeared to have the lead in the number of flaws he possessed. Therein, I feel, may be one of the reasons that God chose Moses. He was flawed. He had a speech impediment, self-esteem issues, a hot-temper, in fact, he was a regular guy and God was able to use him. He used him to manage one of the biggest, most important events in the history of the Israelites and yet he was just like you and me.

I cannot claim to know the mind of God, but I do feel that one of the reasons that He chose to use Moses, was so that we could realize that He can use us, with all our hang-ups and problems, to do His work. That we cannot excuse ourselves, because when He calls us, it is because He can use us just exactly as we are – flaws and all!

Your strength – or His Power?

Eph 3:16-17 'I pray that from His glorious, unlimited resources, He will empower you with inner strength through His Spirit.'

Being strong, independent, self-sufficient, are all characteristics that present day society applauds. Successful business people are lauded for being "self-made" men and women. The focus is always on financial success or super-stardom, never on the person's true character or moral values. In fact, if they do tend to be people with questionable morals and the personality of a villain, it is viewed with amusement or admiration. How the person achieved their success is also very often overlooked, particularly if their methods were unscrupulous and dishonest.

So why do we all strive to be what society wants us to be? God has created us with limitations and weaknesses for a reason. It is through our limitations, our inability to be "superman" that God's amazing power will shine through. This will give Him the glory, and not us. People will realize that if God can use someone as limited as we are, then He can use them to. Through our limitations we learn to depend on God and trust Him for the things that we, on our own, cannot do. This strengthens our love for Him and deepens our relationship with Him.

Consider how puny man is up against the forces of Nature – who can deflect a tornado, stop an earthquake or put out the fires of a volcano? Not one of us, and yet, God created all of these things! Shouldn't the very power and wonder of the world around us make us realize that He is far more powerful than us, but that since He loves us so completely, we can trust Him to give us His strength in troubled times.




 

Worry is like a Rocking Chair….

Matt 6:34 'Don't worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will bring its own worries. Today's trouble is enough for today.'

I don't know what it is about this time of year, but it seems that just when we should be winding down and getting ready for the end of year festivities, people seem to be hit by all kinds of difficulties. My mother has been told that she is going to have to have a knee replacement operation; a friend has just discovered a growth on his kidneys, another has just found out that their new-born baby nephew is very ill, and the list goes on. However, the more I've thought and prayed about it, it really isn't the time of year, it's life! We all have constant challenges to face, difficulties that often seem insurmountable, but in reality, there is no problem too big for God.

God made us weak so that we could learn to depend on Him. He is our strength, if we allow Him to be. He made our lives short so that we could yearn for eternity. He gave us the ability to love, laugh and cry so that we could give our hearts to Him and show others the joy of knowing Him.

No matter what you are facing, ill-health, broken relationships, financial difficulties, just lay it all at His feet and trust that He knows what is best for you. It may be that through your financial struggles your direction in life changes so that God can use you more effectively. Perhaps through your ill-health you learn to slow down and spend time with your Saviour. I personally found that being bed-ridden for a while gave me ample time to pray for others.

To complete the phrase that I used to as this post's title: Worry is like a rocking chair ….. it gives you something to do but it doesn't get you anywhere!! Turn your worried thoughts into prayer – its far more effective!


 

Allowing God to change you!

2 Cor 5:17 'Anyone who belongs to Christ has become a new person. The old life is gone, a new life has begun.'
You are God's work of art – in process! A magnificent masterpiece that He will mould, shape and refine through life's up's and downs to make you the person He want's you to be. To have you reach your fullest potential and be all that you can be in Him!

The thought of God moulding and shaping us can be very upsetting to a lot of people, particularly those who see themselves as 'self-made', independent and strong. The thought that they are in need of change, that they may have to grow emotionally, spiritually and or mentally can be a severe knock to a person's ego and they will so often resist any thought of changing.

On a personal note, I can only tell you that God has, in so many ways, changed me for the better. Certainly, when I gave my life to God I felt that I was a good person, raising my sons on my own, strong-willed, independent and capable. What I was not prepared for was the things that I suddenly saw in my life that I realized were not pleasing to God. My temper for one thing! For such a tiny slip of a person (5'4" and only 58kgs), I was a force to be reckoned with when I got mad!! I remember having fetched all the children from school one day and my step-daughter commenting to me that my road-rage had gone! Then the others all started commenting on how previously I would have screamed at the car that had just cut in front of us, how I wasn't even swearing anymore! Wow!! I hadn't even noticed these things myself, but their comments certainly made me think about my behavior.

I know that the incident I have described above is rather small and inconsequential, and perhaps many of you have had more radical transformations than that, but it was that moment that was the turning point for me. It was this moment that made me realize that God had, already, without me being aware of it, started to transform my heart and, with this knowledge that He could change me without my conscious participation in the process, how much more could He do if I allowed Him to work in my heart?

I must admit that the process of allowing God to change me was not (sorry, IS not) always easy, but it is certainly worthwhile. The changes He has brought about have allowed me to release all my anger and bitterness, to learn to love myself (certainly the hardest battle) and to slowly start seeing that His plans and purposes for my life are far superior to any I may have had. I know that I am still taking baby-steps in my walk with the Lord, and that He still has LOTS of moulding and shaping to do to get me where He wants me to be, but I do know that I can trust Him through the process.

Being Accountable

Jeremiah 23:24 '"Can anyone hide from me in a secret place? Am I not everywhere in all the heavens and earth?" says the Lord.'

When you truly understand that God knows all the secrets hidden in your heart, and yet loves you anyway, you will find that your desire to do things that are pleasing to Him will increase. Having God as your main accountability partner will help prevent you from doing things that you may later regret. However, it is also important that we make ourselves accountable to others as well. Temptations are all around us, every single day of our lives, and Satan loves to see us trip over them! None of us are so pure that we do not have to fight temptation and those who think they are above reproach are only fooling themselves.

Making yourself accountable to others forces you to be more responsible in your actions and to avoid giving in to temptations. Millions of dieters throughout the world have found that having an accountability partner has helped them resist breaking their diet and helped them remain focused and motivated with their exercise routine. In the same way, having a friend who can pray for you and with you, and help you to stay focused on living your life to please God, makes all the difference to your spiritual walk. Of course, your accountability partner does not know everything about you and will only know what you confess to, but if they are walking alongside you they will soon get to know you well enough to know when you are hiding something from them!

I personally have grown to find it incredibly comforting to know that God knows everything about me. That He knows what I am going to think, say or do even before I do! The reason that I find this comforting is because it means He cares. Our heavenly Father, who created the infinite Universe, loves me so much that He is concerned with my every thought! And when I make a mistake, get angry and lose my cool, say something I shouldn't, I know that He still loves me.

It takes strength to hold one's self accountable to others and to God. Making yourself vulnerable and admitting to your weaknesses is one of the most difficult things that human's face. We all like to feel that we are strong enough to handle things on our own and yet that is not the way that God has created us. He has created us for community and a certain level of interdependency. That is why we are told that we are all a "part" of the body of Christ! We are not an independent body, fully self-sufficient and not needing others in any way. No, we are all unique with our own particular gifts and abilities that we bring to enrich and strengthen our Church community in order to make it more effective in doing God's work. Who do you hold yourself accountable to?

The Things We Say…!

Luke 6:45 'The good man brings good things out of the good stored up in his heart …. For out of the overflow of his heart his mouth speaks.'

Every day God presents us with opportunities to impact the lives of others. We do not have to travel to foreign countries to make a difference in this world. We just have to touch the lives of the people that we encounter in our everyday lives. A kind word to a colleague or the lady at the till in the grocery store can impact them more than we may ever know. Often we feel the urge to say something nice to someone but then shyness or the fear of rejection overcomes us and so we say nothing. When we have these urges, it could be God prompting us to do His work and by not doing so we have missed an opportunity to bless someone else.

One of our biggest failings is to let down our 'guard' when we are with the ones that we love most – our families. They often bear the brunt of our unpleasant day as we take our frustrations out on them or allow their actions to annoy us to the extent that we snap out at them in anger. We say things to our families that we would never say to someone else! It is so important for us to remember that they are the ones whose lives we influence the most, particularly our children. However, we are all human, we all have good and bad days and there are times when we will be angry or frustrated. The joy of families is that they know you well enough to know when your behavior is out of character and as a result of things going wrong.

What we say and how we say it is also an indication to others, who may not know us well, of our character. Don't allow anger and frustration to take control and cause you to mistreat someone. Rather let the goodness of your heart make an impact on someone's life today in such a way that they are encouraged and uplifted. Remember that, as a child of God, you are also His representative to the world around you. Let His goodness, love and mercy shine through you today.

God Don’t Make No Junk!

Have you ever felt that you are just not "good enough?" I have that feeling fairly often and it can rob you of your joy for life. It is quite literally a feeling that suffocates you and prevents you from growing emotionally and spiritually. I am convinced that the devil is one hundred percent behind this feeling and uses it to derail you and prevent you from living your life the way God intends you to.

Have you ever been at a function and felt like the outsider, the ugly, frumpy, unwanted one and convinced yourself that your invitation was actually a mistake but that the host is just too polite to say anything? Or looked at your reflection when you're at your most vulnerable and wondered who the freak-show is in the mirror? Oh, and how about this, sat with a group of people and felt like the stupidest person in the room and that everyone is talking above your IQ level?

So how do you combat it? Well, personally, it's one of the hardest things to fight. If you mention it to others then they just brush it off as you being silly, or if you try and convince yourself that you are wrong, you always end up losing the argument! I have found that the only way to deal with this is to remind myself that God has made me in His image; that He created me to be exactly, uniquely, specifically as I am and that it's ok if I don't fit in with societies idea of 'beauty'; in addition He spent years pursuing me because He, the Creator of the Universe, loves me exactly as I am and wants a personal relationship with me! Of course, one additional thing that you can do is tell that pathetic little wimp of a demon to buzz off because you are busy and totally not interested in his stupid ramblings and comments. I personally enjoy doing that as I find it rather empowering!

As hard as it is sometimes, try and remind yourself of some of the following simple truths; you are not what you weigh; it's the size of your heart that draws people to you, not the size of your thighs! You are exactly as God wants you to be, but it's up to you to use all that He gave you to be the best you can be – you cannot be anybody else and if you were, well then who would they be? Other people can only put you down if you let them! Don't make excuses for who you are, make the most of who you are!

If anyone has any pearls of wisdom to add, please write them in the comment box.

Satan Tempts – God Tests – Do you know the difference?

 

How often do you hear people say "God is tempting me?" Quite honestly it drives me crazy because they don't seem to realize that God will never tempt us to sin. That is, after all, what temptation is. Satan will always tempt us, it is his plan to de-rail us from our walk with God, to cause us to sin and consequently feel ashamed, guilty, unworthy, anything that will make us turn our backs on God. Temptation comes in many different forms. We are all familiar with the well known ones of lust, adultery, pornography, addictions like alcohol and gambling, but there are far more subtle temptations that we have to resist. For example, to spend your tithe money on a new gadget or handbag, to spend hours playing games on the computer when you could be spending some of that time in prayer or reading your Bible. To find other "important" things to do when the Church calls for volunteers to help feed the poor, etc., etc. I am sure that everyone of you reading this can come up with some secret "pleasure" that you have that takes your attention away from God and fritters your time away on some useless pursuit.

God however, will test us. In the same way that a motor vehicle is tested for safety, endurance, reliability, so God will put us through various tests in life. The tests that God gives us may include hardships, persecution and suffering. The testing that God puts us through will refine us, strengthen us and draw us ever closer to Him. There are so many examples in the Bible of how God tested people, Job, of course being the most well known one. Put yourself in Job's shoes for a minute; would you have reacted to God's tests as he did? Or would you turn your back on God, not trusting Him with the bigger picture of your life.

We have to understand that our problems and trials are the testing ground for how God is going to use us, throughout our lives, to advance His Kingdom. We are being molded and shaped by the master potter, however, unlike clay, we have a choice as to how we are going to react to that molding and shaping. Just as a lump of clay does not know what it is going to be shaped into, but through being malleable and workable the Potter is able to turn it into a work of art that is both functional and beautiful, so we do not know what God is shaping us for. That is where faith comes in, and when we have faith we are able to be obedient and when we are obedient God uses us in amazing, life fulfilling ways that will be rewarded for all eternity.

 

Bride or “Mistress”? Which one are You?

I don't know about you but when I really care about someone, I talk about them all the time. Their name is constantly on my lips and I am always telling everyone who cares to listen, just how fantastic they are! I want to stay in touch with them all the time and am so grateful for the fact that I live in this modern age of hi-tech communications. What would I do without the ability to phone my darling hubby when he is far away (which he often is), or video-call my precious step-daughter on the other side of the world, or send text messages to friends and all the countless other methods we have of communicating. Don't you feel like that? Can you remember when you first fell in love? Didn't you want to tell everyone about this fantastic person you were convinced that the sun rose and set on? How about your first child? Certainly he/she is the most beautiful baby that has ever been born? Grandchildren? You get the picture?

Have you ever had an affair or known someone who has? Imagine what it must be like to sneak around and never be able to tell anyone about this person you love so much, never to be able to include them in those special family events or to meet in public places in case you get seen by someone who knows you. I can only presume that affairs never last because they are nothing but a pile of messy frustrations and unfulfilled dreams. They are doomed from the outset because they are selfish, hurtful, underhand relationships with no future to build on. An affair may stroke an ego or satisfy a desire but it is shallow and stagnant as opposed to a marriage which is like a river, filled with life, growth and movement. A marriage, like a river, may have its rocky and turbulent places, but it has direction and purpose.

The point I am trying to make is are you "married" to Jesus Christ, or just having a "fling on the side" with Him? Do you want to communicate with Him and praise Him all the time? Do you have a desire to show or tell everyone what He has done in your life and is still doing or do you keep your relationship with Him a secret? Are you living your life in a way that gives glory to Him, regardless of whether or not it makes you popular, or are you living to please your peers? Do you keep your relationship with Christ a secret and only make it to Church if there is nothing else happening on your social calendar? Do you laugh at the odd "dirty joke" so that people don't think you're a prude, maybe even tell one of your own? I could list a thousand other things that society finds acceptable and normal but that Christ would condemn and any true follower of Christ would not participate in.

A person who truly loves Christ cannot live in a way that is not pleasing to Him. Their desire is to praise Him and to pray, to serve Him by doing His works, being His hands and feet and spreading the news about what He has done for each and every one of us! To do this you don't have to become a missionary and travel to some foreign place, you can do all of that right in your own home or workplace. You can smile at a stranger, hold the lift door for someone, speak kindly to your employees, listen to a colleague who is having a bad time or provide a meal for a family in need. Of course there are a multitude of other things you can do, big or small, but it so often is the little things that count. Let your relationship with Jesus show in the way you conduct your life. Let the joy of knowing that the Creator loves you spill over and touch the lives of others so that they too want to know and experience His love in their lives!

So ask yourself, are you a loving "bride", pure in your love and commitment to Christ, or is your relationship a well kept secret?

Turn Times of Doubt into Times of Strength

We all have doubts at some time or the other. We generally doubt ourselves more than anyone else, but it just takes one disappointment, one situation or relationship going sour, and we begin to doubt God. When things seem to go contrary to what we are wanting, loved ones fall ill or betray us, or a countless other host of circumstances, the first one we throw all our doubts onto is God.

Personally, I think this is crazy! Not that I have never had doubts, far from it. In the depths of depression, God was the first one I doubted and blamed! No, the reason I say this is crazy, is because God is the only one that we can depend on. When I was circling down into the abyss of depression, feeling that I was unloved and unlovable, that I was a waste of a human skin who was of no earthly use for anything, that is when God was able to reach through to me, and convince me that He did have a plan and a purpose for my life and that He does love me.

When we are faced with a tough situation, a betrayal, or anything else that turns our world upside down, that's when we should be turning to God. He doesn't mind if we doubt Him as it opens the door for further conversation with Him and fresh opportunities for Him to work in your life and to show you that you can depend on Him. Give Him the chance to strengthen you, to renew your faith and to demonstrate His unfailing love. You will find, as you spend more time with Him, on your knees, a peace and inner joy that will permeate your soul and give you the courage and the ability to get through whatever difficulties you are facing. God allows us to go through these hard times because it is only when we are 'beaten' that we can be re-shaped and re-worked into a stronger, more faith-filled follower of Christ. Remember that He is ultimate truth and ultimate love and He loves us completely, therefore, we can trust Him over and above anyone or anything else.

 

A Trouble Shared

Philippians 4:13-14 'I can do everything through Him who gives me strength. Yet it was good of you to share in my troubles.' How many times have we heard just verse 13 quoted – with emphasis on the first few words "I can do everything". We are all so guilty of keeping the emphasis on verse 13 and completely ignoring verse 14. God has promised us that He will strengthen us and be with us through life's difficulties, but God has also created us to be in relationship both with Him and with each other. He has given us gifts that are only of any use when they are used for someone else's benefit; teaching, encouraging, hospitality, etc., are all pretty useless if they are not used for someone else's benefit!

The old saying "a trouble shared is a trouble halved" is true. The problem may still be your full responsibility, but by discussing it with someone (particularly someone close to you), you no longer feel so alone and you are able to get a different perspective on it, perhaps even some advice. By allowing someone to be a part of your problem, you are also allowing them to possibly fill a role that God had for them. Their role in helping you through your difficulty may be something that they have to grow through as well. Part of God's purpose for their lives and possibly for yours as well, could be the whole reason that you are going through that particular difficulty.

This doesn't mean that we must now start dumping our problems on everyone else! Not at all! With a little bit of discernment and wisdom you will know when and whom to share your problems with and to what degree! Just understand though, that God will often send someone to help you, it may be a stranger or someone close to you, but the thing is to accept the help that comes your way and not deny the person the opportunity to walk beside you. When I had my hysterectomy last year, my step-daughter was able to come and spend over a month with me, seeing to my needs and running the household. In addition to me being blessed with all her help and her wonderful company, she was blessed (although I am sure not as much) by having the opportunity to spend time with her Dad, her step-brothers and her friends, that she would not otherwise have had before she left for a year in Japan!

Can We Understand God?

How many husbands do you hear saying "I just don't understand her!" when talking about their wives, and vice versa when us women talk about our husbands. We look at our teenage children and wonder what planet they came from and who they are! They certainly don't seem to be anything like the children we gave birth too!

Our lives are fraught with misunderstandings and the consequences that result from them. From something as simple as who was going to take out the trash, to larger problems which can result in major fights and sometimes even divorce. These misunderstandings also occur in the work place and in miscommunications between friends. We are constantly having to ensure that we understood exactly what was being communicated to us.

This lack of proper understanding of each other is even more evident between the different sexes. Countless books have been written about this age old problem, offering countless different methods of overcoming this problem. I am sure, however, that in the next year, another bestseller will hit the shelves proclaiming to providing the answer to these problems of misunderstanding and miscommunication.

Yet I cannot help but wonder if this inability to fully understand each other, all the time, is not part of God's plan for us? If we were able to comprehend exactly what our partner wanted to express, would we have a need for patience? Would we need to learn to exercise self-control? Perhaps if we were able to know exactly what was going on in each other's minds then there would be no enjoyment in learning the mysteries that make up the psyche of each individual. Having a relationship with someone requires effort. We cannot be friends with someone without first extending a hand to them and drawing them into the circle of our lives. By doing this we are saying that there is something about them that makes them attractive to us and that we want to spend time with them. We then have to build on that relationship – whether it is a friendship or a more serious, more intimate relationship – it still needs to be developed and nurtured.

In the same way we have to understand that our relationship with God is the same. We cannot know His mind, why He does things the way He does, or even how He did them. We cannot even understand His heart. What we can know, if we are willing to enter into a relationship with Him, is that He does love us! Despite our sins, irrespective of our talents and abilities, our financial situation or our physical appearance, God does love us! Why He loves us exactly is a mystery! We are after all, a pretty miserable bunch! He gave us the Earth to look after, and we've trashed it; He instructed us to love each other and yet we are constantly at war; He asks us only to love Him in return, of our own free will, and yet we deny His existence and take more notice of the theories of crackpots rather than accept His word in the message of love (the Bible) that He has left for us! But still we want to understand God when we cannot even understand each other?

I am sure that if you were to ask any couple who have been married for a number of decades if they fully understand their spouse their answer will be No. Does this mean that they don't love them or that they are unable to accept that their partner loves them back? Of course not! They would not still be in a relationship if that were the case. Do you understand that your friends are your friends because there is a heart connection between you that does not depend on full understanding of each other and also an acceptance of the fact that you may at times disagree with each other? Of course you do! So why do we find it so hard to extend the same attitude towards God? The fact of that matter is that God is way bigger than our understanding. All we can do is accept His love, His mercy and His grace. He offers us a free gift of salvation, an eternity spent with Him, and all He asks is that we believe!! That is so amazing, so incredibly mind-blowing! A mustard seed size of faith and belief is all that is required and we get so much!

All I can say is, I don't understand it! Not at all! But I don't understand my husband, children or friends all the time either. I am not going to tell them that I do not want a relationship with them because I don't understand them; nor am I ever going to tell God that I don't want to be in relationship with Him because He is beyond my comprehension. No! Instead I am going to revel in the fact that my great big, incomprehensible God loves me, died for me and wants a relationship with me! Little old me! Now that is AWESOME!

Finding Forgiveness

Forgiveness must be one of the hardest things that God calls us to do! Yet it is the one thing that we desire the most for ourselves – that's when we are willing to admit that we have even done something wrong! Have you ever noticed that about yourself? You excuse your actions or try to lay some of the blame on someone else or on circumstances? Taking responsibility for our own mistakes and wrongdoings is very hard indeed but yes, we do always want to be forgiven for what we have done. Yet let someone else hurt us or our loved ones, we find it almost impossible to let go of that anger and bitterness that we feel towards them. We feel morally justified in our reaction to what they have done and consider forgiveness as a way of "letting them off the hook."

My ex-husband (deceased) once physically abused me, (I didn't stick around to let him do it a second time), and my parents were, understandably, furious. This was over twenty years ago and I had moved on with my life. One of the first things that I did when I became a Christian was to forgive him for all the things that he had done to both myself and my children. Although I never saw him face to face to do this, I forgave him in my heart. The relief that I felt when I did this was like having a large block of ice taken off my chest! About a year ago I was with my mother and we saw him in a mall where we were planning on doing some shopping. I was astounded at how much anger and bitterness she still carried towards him. She was equally amazed at the fact that I had forgiven him and seeing him didn't worry me in the slightest! I explained to her that her lack of forgiveness for what he had done would not have affected him in the slightest. The only person that her anger affected was herself! She held all those negative emotions in her heart and would bring them out to mentally "chew on" every now and again over the last twenty years.

Once she realized that she was only hurting herself and that forgiving him would benefit her even more than it would him, she was able to let go of that anger and pain. She was also able to forgive herself for not being able to protect me, something that she had been blaming herself for, unnecessarily, all these years. Not too long after that he made front page news. He was a scam artist and had finally been caught up with after fifteen years of low key activity. Shortly before his trial he died under rather peculiar circumstances. We were both able to feel pity for him because we had forgiven him. We both realized that even though he had done so much harm (the beating he gave me was just the final straw) we found no pleasure in his death or even relief. Our forgiveness did not change his life in any way, but it certainly changed ours. Walking around nursing old hurts and anger is very detrimental to our physical health and our spiritual healing and growth.

Although in our case we never got the opportunity to express our forgiveness, nor would it have made any difference if we had (he was a sociopath), there are so often times when we need to tell someone that we have forgiven them. Very often you will find that that person had no idea why you were so angry with them! This will often lead to a gradual restoration of the damaged relationship. It is a fact that most often the people we need to forgive are the people who have been closest to us. It is a simple fact of human nature that the ones we love the most are the ones who have the most power to cause us pain!

In addition to all of the benefits to ourselves in forgiveness, the question must be asked "what right do we have NOT to forgive?" When we consider how Jesus died, the torture he endured, just so that we could be forgiven of our sins – then we need to understand that with such a great sacrifice having been made for us, we must forgive others in return!

ABUNDANT LIVING – GOD’S WAY!

When I first heard the phrase "Abundant Living" I got terribly worried and wondered if this was a teaching on prosperity. Now don't get me wrong, there is nothing wrong with being wealthy, I just feel that too much emphasis is placed on it by society and some churches and people feel that they need to have a lot of money in order to be happy. Over the last year I have come to realize what this phrase really means (yes I know, I can be a tad slow sometimes!).

A year ago I had both the pleasure and the pain of spending time with a friend as she battled with cancer. I was privileged to sit with her at the oncology centre whilst she underwent a couple of chemotherapy treatments. This generally took a couple of hours and what an insight I received into the human spirit at that time. One gentleman there – I'll call him Tom, was the heart and soul of the centre. He too was there to receive his chemotherapy treatments, but he made it his business to keep everyone cheerful and focused on a future filled with good health. He planned parties and camping trips. He laughed, teased and joked with everyone present and never failed to make it clear how much he loved the Lord. He was living, despite his cancer, abundantly!

The lesson that I learned there was that happiness was not dependant on health or wealth but rather it is a condition of the heart. God has given us free will and thereby enabled us to choose how we are going to handle every situation that we are faced with. Wealth does not provide happiness at all. It may make our lives more physically comfortable and provide us with material goods, but it cannot and does not provide happiness. Certainly with wealth we also have the ability to help others, to be a positive influence in our community, but the percentage of wealthy people who actually do this is not very high. Wealth does not prevent a person from contracting life threatening diseases, nor does it lengthen your life-span in any way. It cannot avert tragedies from happening and the wealthy person feels as much emotional pain and suffering as the poorest person on the streets.

When God wanted us to live abundantly He wanted us to love abundantly, to have abundant joy, to pour our hearts into caring for those around us, wherever He places us. To know with all our hearts that He loves us so much that He was willing to send His precious Son to die for us. This knowledge should ignite a fire in our hearts to want to reach out to the lost and the hurting, the poor (both spiritually and materially) and the persecuted and to be His hands and feet in the lives of the people around us.

God may bless some people with abundant financial wealth, but as He has provided the blessing, He wants it to be used for His purposes. The more a wealthy person blesses others with their giving, the more blessing they will receive. Some people however, He blesses with abundant love! Those wonderful people, who cannot help but love others and commit their lives to caring for them. In this instance, Mother Theresa immediately comes to mind. She may have lived a very frugal life in one of the poorest countries in the world, surrounded by sickness and poverty, but she certainly lived her life abundantly!

I am sure that we can all think of examples of people either famous or within our immediate spheres who live abundantly the way that God intended them too! Their lives are filled with an inner peace and joy that cannot be explained and despite their financial position (or complete lack thereof, they are happy!

How can you live more abundantly? Is there more that you can do for your family? Can you spend more time with your spouse and children? Is there someone you know who has been unhappy lately that you could spend time with to help them through this difficult patch? Have you got money or food to spare for someone worse off than yourself? How many people have you hugged today or at least given a smile too? There are so many things that you can do to bring joy into the life of someone else and yet at the same time, get so much joy out of living! You could pray for people you know and through that prayer watch miracles happen in their lives! When you pray for someone you bring a petition on their behalf to our Creator…. What a wonderful gift that is!

Live life abundantly! Spend time with God every day; read His message of love to you – the Bible; be willing to do God's work and be a blessing in the lives of the people around you; smile often; hug regularly; pray constantly and try and see other people as God sees them.

Worry – the Joy Stealer!

One of my all time favourite sayings is "Worry is like a rocking chair – it gives you something to do but it doesn't get you anywhere!" How very true! I don't know how many people I have known in my life who feel that it is necessary to "worry" about situations and people. They feel that if they are not worrying about their children, friends, whatever, that it means they don't care! What utter rubbish! I read once that "worry is a misuse of your God-given imagination." Now that is right on the nail! I have learned from personal experience that worrying about a situation will do absolutely nothing about it! Worrying robs you of precious time and energy that could be better spent in prayer, action and trusting God. In fact, worrying about something is the same as telling God that you do not think that He is capable of handling the situation! Let me give you a personal example of how worrying was the most ridiculous thing I could do.

We had been renting a home for about eighteen years. The children had grown up there, the schools were in walking distance, church was a five minute drive and all our friends were only a few short kilometers away. The house was not the best and the neighbourhood had deteriorated due to an influx of businesses into what had been an exclusively residential area, but it was home and we were happy. Our landlords then gave the administration of their properties over to their son, and within a few short months we had been given two months notice to evacuate as he wished to use the property for business purposes. This happened in mid-November and we had until mid- January to find a new home! Have you ever tried looking for property over the Christmas / New Year period? Things are just not happening at that time!!

I must confess that all my faith flew out the window and I was absolutely furious with God for doing this to me! How could He allow this to happen? There was nothing I could do but face the inevitable and so my husband and I began the frantic search for a new home. To cut a long story short, I didn't want to leave the main area we were in as I wanted to remain close to church and friends but the houses in the area were beyond our limited budget. Eventually, and all at the eleventh hour, God, to whom I had by then given over the entire messy situation, provided us with a home about 20 kilometres from our old area. So how did my situation change? I have a lovely little home (that belongs to us) with an enormous garden; five dogs; incredible variety of bird life; no traffic noise; less humidity, etc., etc. I still attend the same church and see my friends just as often now as I did then. The one difference is that I now have the space to entertain which I did not have before.

God took a situation that filled me with fear and despair and turned it into a wonderful blessing! I truly worried about nothing and should have trusted Him right from the start. I am currently facing another similar situation. Again, there is nothing that I personally can do to alter the events (all of which are just hearsay at the moment), but I can trust God. His purpose for our lives is not to rob us and steal our joy, but to give us what is best or us. We can come before Him with our concerns and fears but we do not need to worry because He is taking care of us!

Are Christians ‘Needy’ People?

I recently had the opportunity to speak to someone close to me about the Lord. This person (let's call her Jane) commented that she felt that it was not necessary to go to church to be a Christian. Her opinion of churches is that they are filled with 'needy' people! I was horrified! However, I felt that it was important that I take into consideration Jane's personality, her personal situation and worldview before commenting.

Jane has become very successful in her line of work. She is well known, sought after and has had several magazine articles published about her work. Her husband is also successful and they run their own business. They lack for nothing materially and both feel that they are well-balanced, intelligent, strong-willed and highly capable. Neither of them has really felt the need for God in their lives as they have been able to achieve all that they have done on their own without having to 'depend' on a higher power to see them through. They are, in their minds, self-made people.

I then considered what she had said about the types of people who attend church and realized that she definitely cast me into the needy category. You see, I had made some huge mistakes in my life which she was aware of and even though I have learnt from those mistakes, grown as a person, and am now using my past experiences combined with training, to counsel people, in her eyes I am a failure in life. I then considered all my wonderful friends in church and their situations and quite honestly, couldn't think of anyone who fitted the dictionary definition of 'needy'. Yet each one of them loved the Lord with all their hearts and souls and all came to church regularly. Most of them are actively involved in the church in some form or the other, facilitating cell groups, teaching bible study, leading worship, running the children's ministry, etc., etc. They do so happily, with no need to be coerced into helping out at all.

The dictionary definition of 'needy' is as follows; poor; underprivileged; emotionally dependant; deprived; disadvantaged. To me, that described the people that we serve! The HIV orphans living in shacks; the street children; the elderly – not the members of our church. I do know that despite the fact that most of the members of our church are middle-income families, they do have their personal problems just like everyone else! On further consideration I realized that Jane, despite her relative wealth, is just as needy as anyone else! You see, despite her healthy financial status, she never appears to be truly happy. Certainly if you were to ask her, she would insist that she leads a wonderful life and is perfectly content, but she lacks peace, is constantly chasing the next 'big job', and helps herself relax in the evenings with several glasses of wine before bed.

So after looking carefully at both groups of people, I decided that if Christians are 'needy' people I am so glad to be one. For the Christians I know and love are just as hard working as Jane, some are wealthier than her, some are not there yet, however they all have a wonderful, inner peace that comes from knowing that they are loved by their loving Father in Heaven. They have the joy of knowing that He has them safely in His hands and that He is there beside them through good times and bad. They also do not fear death, in fact many even talk of it with a sense of anticipation at the thought of finally being in Heaven with their maker, the infinite Creator of the Universe, who keeps the stars spinning yet is concerned with every tiny event in their lives! They have a sense of belonging, of extended family, of all being the children of God. They have a sense of purpose which they get from knowing that God has a plan for their lives, and that their lives matter, that if they are surrendered to Him, God will use them in amazing ways to advance His kingdom. That He cares for them and will bless them and shower them with His amazing love!

A needy person is very seldom able to give anything of themselves to others due to their physical or emotionally deprived state. That being the case I firmly believe that, with all the loving, kindness and generosity that is displayed by all the Christians that I know, they are certainly not the 'needy' ones!

Calm in the Chaos

Have you ever met one of those people who exude calmness and quietude? Despite the fact that they may be frantically busy and under pressure they always manage to appear as though nothing really bothers them. They frustrate the rest of us who rush around like headless chickens, and yet they are the ones we turn to in times of a crisis situation. Funny isn't it? We lambaste them for their apparent disorganization, their laid back ways, etc., and yet, in the long run they achieve just as much as we do – maybe more!

I have the privilege of knowing someone just like that. I am not saying that this person never worries about situations and even occasionally gets a trifle flustered, but there is a quiet strength and calm about them that never really leaves them. Until this morning I only had an inkling as to what the reason is for this person's behavior, and then I read Isaiah 30:15 "This is what the Sovereign Lord, the Holy One of Israel says. "Only in returning to me and resting in me will you be saved. In quietness and confidence is your strength." That is when I got it!! The light-bulb moment revealed to me that this person's quietness and confidence is a direct result of walking with the Lord. This person has been through as many trials and difficulties as anyone else and yet one would not think so on first getting to know them.

So what does this mean for the rest of us? Simply that we are not turning to God, not trusting Him with all aspects of our lives. We say that God is the "pilot" in our life's journey, and yet we are constantly wrenching the controls out of His hands. By saying that we must 'trust God" with our daily lives, does not mean that we must live "fatalistically". Rather we need to deal with each day's difficulties as best we can, but trust that God, who does have our best interests in His heart, will see to the outcome of every situation.

When you are able to live your life fully resting in God's arms, then you too can be calm no matter what situations come your way. No-one is perfect, yet by trusting God we are given His strength to face life's challenges, and the result of choosing to do this will be that we too can become a calm haven in a world of chaos. We too, can lend our strength to others and have the calm assurance in our lives that, no matter what happens, God is ultimately in control.

DETOURS AND SIDE ROADS

"A truly happy person is one who can enjoy the scenery while on a detour!" This quote was one that I had to re-read several times to really "get" it. I don't know how you feel about detours and side roads but I am one of those people who likes to have my whole trip mapped out in advance. I make lists of all the things that I need to take with me, tick them off before leaving and like to know exactly how long the journey will take and try to plan ahead for all eventualities! Stop laughing!! Yes, I am a bit of a "control freak" in that way. In fact, a joke amongst my friends and family is a small cosmetic bag that I have packed and keep in my car – it contains (amongst other things) pain killers, nail clippers, scissors, band aids, an emergency blanket, tape measure, calculator, note pad, energy bars, energy tablets, guitar strings, pen-knife, etc., etc. I would just like to point out that I am not the one who has had a need for anything from my bag, but several of my friends have!!

Anyway, my point is that no matter what precautions we take we can never know just what life is going to throw at us. No matter how much planning we do for a trip we cannot control the weather conditions, the potholes, road-works, accidents and other things that take place that may cause us to have to select an alternative route to our intended destination.

That is why I am so glad to have the Creator of the Universe in my corner and in control. No matter what plans we may have for our lives, if we surrender everything to God and let him be the driving force in our daily living, He will always get us to the best place we can be! God only wants us to live for Him, to live our lives doing His will and if we do that, we can be sure of an interesting time and that the journey He takes us on will be for more rewarding than anything we can plan for ourselves.

So if your best laid plans don't seem to be going the way you want them to, no matter how much prayer you have dedicated to them, then just enjoy the detour God is taking you on and trust Him to get you to your destination. He always has your best interests at heart because he totally adores you!

WHERE IS GOD?

I am currently feeling as though God has left the building! That I am standing on a crumbling ledge with no where to go but down. Intellectually I know that this is not true. But knowing something in my head doesn't always connect with what is in my heart!

I know that most times when someone feels like this it is because they have experienced some tragedy or crisis. Alternatively the day to day problems just seem to get to a point where they are too heavy to carry any longer and you just want to turn your back on everything, walk out the door and keep on walking! In my case my depression has been rearing its ugly head telling me that I am a waste of a human skin, worthless, useless and my life always has been and always will be meaningless! Not a very pleasant place to be let me assure you.

So what do we do when these feelings take a grip on our hearts and minds? Do we give ourselves a pep talk and say "buck up, you are just being silly", do we ignore how we are feeling and try to pretend that all is well and simply keep ourselves so busy that we do not have time to think about how we are feeling. Or do we allow the strong pull of depression to suck us down to the very bottom of its miserable black hole and wallow in our pain and misery? Well I tried the pep talk, it didn't work! I am too tired to pretend but have decided that I have had enough time in that black hole to never want to go back down there again. But believe me, the mouth of that hole is treacherously slippery and it is an uphill battle to pull out of it.

The only thing that we can do is call out to God and know that He hears our cries! He has promised to never leave us and because He is Truth, He cannot lie! There are times though when He is silent, as we may have a lesson to learn from the situation that we are going through. That does not mean that He is not still with us and ultimately still loving us completely!

We have to remember that God pursues us with His love. He wants all of us to come to Him but will never force us. He gives us the choice of following Him or not! So if He is going to devote so much time and thought and love on US then He will not leave our side or let us down, no matter how bleak our situation may be.

So that is where God is, even in our darkest times – He is right beside us, waiting lovingly and patiently for us to acknowledge Him and understand that when we feel worthless, we are not because He loves us, created us and has a purpose for our lives. When we wonder why we are still alive and other, more deserving people are not, it's because He hasn't finished with us yet! When we feel as though we are standing alone on a crumbling ledge, He is wanting us to trust Him and take a step of faith out in to what seems like a vast nothingness but is actually the start of another part of His wonderful plan for our lives!

ARE YOU LIVING YOUR DREAM – OR SOMEONE ELSE’S?

If faced with the question "what is your dream for your life" how would you answer? About a year ago this question was asked during a leadership programme that I was on. It sent me into a complete tailspin and was the catalyst for my depression to sink to an all time low! I realised that, in my late forties, not only did I not have any dreams for my life but that the few that I had in my youth had withered and died. After almost a year of soul-searching, fighting depression and clawing my way through each day, I have finally found the courage to tentatively start dreaming again.

As this subject is so close to my heart, I was thrilled when our pastor began a series of sermons on living God's dream for our lives. His one question raised an alarm bell and that is why I am using it as the title for this message.

Many people, women in particular, find their dreams being shelved or chucked out completely when they get married. I don't think that this is always a deliberate decision, rather it is a case of putting the needs of their spouse and children first.

Another similar situation is when a parent imposes their dreams on to their children. Pressure is put on little 'Johnny/Mary' to become an engineer or doctor, when all he/she wants to do is ……. (fill in the blanks if this applies to you.) In so many cases the parent who does this is someone who was unable to live out their own dreams and so tries to do so through their child.

To all those people out there who find themselves in this situation, I beg you to do something about it! God has put a dream into each of our hearts that He will use to fulfil His purposes. The dream that He has given us will be the one thing that will make our lives purposeful. Living out someone else's dream instead of your own is not a sacrifice that God wants us to make and is unhealthy in the long run as a time will come when bitterness and resentment will take up residence in our hearts.

Are we Insignificant? Or Not?

Have you ever watched a programme that shows how tiny our planet is in our galaxy and how we are positioned in an extremely "insignificant" section of our galaxy. Then you find out how small and insignificant our galaxy is in relation to other galaxies in the universe!!! You can't help but wonder about how significant we are. After all we are nothing but minute particles on a tiny planet that hangs out on the outer edges of a relatively tiny galaxy…… therefore why should we matter? After all if we accept that God created all this magnificence and we are such a miniscule part of it, then what is our role?? Do we even have one?

Well, the fact that God created us in His image immediately makes us significant. He didn't make the galaxies, or the oceans, or anything else for that matter, in His image. Just us. To me, that means a lot. I have been asked, "Well what if we are not the only planet that God put living beings on"? My thinking on that is "So what?" If God chose to populate millions of other planets with people then that would be His choice. It wouldn't make any difference to the fact that He made us, He loves us, so much so that He sent us Son to die for us, and He wants us to spend eternity with Him! As far as I am concerned, that makes us extremely significant!! As for our role, well God has told us that He wants us to love Him and do His will in our lives, but He gave us the choice to either accept Him or reject Him! He gave us CHOICE!! That is significant!! He could have made us love Him automatically, without any say in the matter, but He didn't. He chose to allow us to choose as to whether or not we want to be in relationship with Him.

As miniscule as we may be in the Universe, with lifetimes that are comparatively short, God has taken the time to make each one of us different from the other, nobody shares our fingerprints, nobody has the same dreams and aspirations. God has lovingly crafted each and every one of us to His specific design, for His specific purpose, and yet He still loves us so much that He allows us to choose to come to Him or not!!! The Creator of the Universe loves us, cares about our daily problems, and wants to have a personal relationship with each of us, I'd say that makes us significant, wouldn't you?

TODAY IS YOUR BEST DAY!

Psalm 118:24 'This is the day the Lord has made let us rejoice and be glad in it.' How many times have we complained about having a "bad day" or felt buoyant because we have had a great day! Every day we face is a gift from God. The good ones and the bad. The bad ones refine us and the good ones restore us. It is important that we understand the fact that once a day has gone, it is not going to be repeated. That we have to make the most of every day that we have. If you are working in a job that doesn't satisfy you, but you need it to keep a roof over your family's head and feed and clothe them, then try and find ways to get satisfaction out of your day in other ways. I will use myself as an example. I worked as a secretary ever since leaving college (secretarial college) and I hated every moment of it. I did, however, find that I enjoyed being with people, made friends easily and always had people coming to me with their personal problems. I remember my different places of employment not by the work involved, but by the people I worked with and the problems they faced. Looking back on my life, I realized that God had made it possible for me to get through the dreary times and at the same time showed me what area He had in mind for me. I have recently completed a course in Christian Counselling!

Be grateful for every day that you have, even when it seems impossible as you deal with hardship or even tragedy. For God is using all these situations, good and bad, to mould you into the person that He designed you to be. I am not suggesting, when I say make the most of each day, that you go out and live your life recklessly, but rather that you make the best of whatever situation that you are in. Living this way allows God to work through you and your life will be enriched and filled with an inner joy and peace that no man can destroy.